Ruby Sparks - Discussion Guide

Zoe Kazan and Paul Dano in Ruby Sparks
Image © Twentieth Century Fox. All righs reserved. Used by permission.

Summary

Calvin (Paul Dano) is a young author whose precocious first novel won him huge acclaim as a teenager. Ten years later, he is now an insecure mess living off past glories. Unable to write, he spends his days taking care of his dog Scotty, and dreaming about meeting someone who really understands him. These dreams are so potent that when his therapist (Elliott Gould) sets him a writing exercise, he invents Ruby Sparks (Zoe Kazan), a quirky girl who’s his idea of a perfect partner.

As he obsesses over her, Ruby becomes increasingly real to him. But it’s still a shock when she appears in his house one day, eating breakfast cereal, and completely oblivious to the fact that she’s a fictional construct. To his astonishment, Calvin discovers that, not only can other people see and interact with Ruby too, but that he can change her personality and behaviour simply by writing about it. It’s an impossibly perfect scenario. He has conjured his dream girl out of thin air.

Life with Ruby is about to get complicated, however. When she develops a mind of her own, Calvin learns that being in a relationship with an ideal is far easier than being in a relationship with a person.

Background

Zoe Kazan in Ruby Sparks
Image © Twentieth Century Fox. All righs reserved. Used by permission.

Ruby Sparks was written by Zoe Kazan, an actress who has appeared in films such as Meek’s Cutoff and Revolutionary Road. Fascinated by the Pygmalion myth, and inspired by her own experiences in past relationships, she began to write a screenplay which she shared with Paul Dano – her real-life boyfriend – at an early stage. He suggested that the two of them might play Ruby and Calvin, and that directors Jonathan Dayton and Valeria Faris, with whom he had previously worked on Little Miss Sunshine, might be suited to the material.

The film has received a largely positive reception from critics, with particular praise for Kazan in her dual duty as writer/star. It has also been hailed by some as the definitive deconstruction of the ‘Manic Pixie Dream Girl’, a phrase coined by critic Nathan Rabin to describe a particular kind of stock female character:

That bubbly, shallow cinematic creature that exists solely in the fevered imaginations of sensitive writer-directors to teach broodingly soulful young men to embrace life and its infinite mysteries and adventures.[1]

Questions for discussion

1. Did you enjoy the film, and why/why not? What did you make of Zoe Kazan’s script, and her performance at the title character?

2. ‘Quirky, messy women whose problems only make them endearing aren’t real.’ – Harry (Chris Messina)
   
   Can you think of any other ‘Manic Pixie Dream Girls’ on film, and what do you think about this kind of character? What, if anything, is wrong with portraying women in this way? How does Ruby Sparks use the stereotype to make its point?

3. What impression do we get of Calvin at the beginning of the film? What role does Scotty the dog play in his life? What factors have contributed to the state he’s in when we meet him?

4. Why does Calvin invent Ruby the way she is initially? What aspects of her personality particularly appeal to him, and what does he feel that she will be able to do for him? What might your ideal romantic partner be like?

5. Calvin: What if you get sick of me?
   Ruby: I won’t. I promise.
   
   What are Calvin’s main fears about being in a relationship, and how does he try to deal with them? Is it possible to truthfully promise somebody that we won’t ‘get sick of them’, either in a romantic relationship or a friendship? What might help somebody to keep this promise?

6. ‘How do I know it’s me making her happy, without me making her happy?’ – Calvin
   
   Why are Ruby’s authentic responses to Calvin ultimately more meaningful to him than the ones he controls? Are choice and free will necessary components of real love, and why/why not? Might the name Calvin be significant in this respect?

7. ‘There has to be space in a relationship, otherwise it’s like we’re the same person.’ – Ruby
   
   Why does Calvin dislike the idea of Ruby having her own friends and interests? Why is it so tempting to try and control the other person in a relationship, and why is it so damaging?

8. ‘The only person that you wanted to be in a relationship with was you.’ – Lila (Deborah Ann Woll)
   
   What do we learn about Calvin from his encounter with ex-girlfriend Lila? What – if anything – is the distinction between loving someone, needing them, and using them?

9. ‘I don’t think of him as a villain at all. I just think he’s human.’ – Paul Dano on Calvin[2]
   
   To what extent does Calvin become a villain towards the end of the film? What makes his actions so disturbing, and what parallels might they have in real-life relationships? Why do human beings have such a strong need to gain affirmation from others, and how can this need become problematic?

10. ‘[In relationships] I’ve had a feeling that there’s this person called Zoe Kazan, and the person I’m with loves her, but that person is not me. It’s sort of five shades off from me.’ – Zoe Kazan[3]
    
    How is this idea explored by the film? Why is authenticity in relationships so difficult, and is it ever truly possible? What does it actually mean to be ‘loved for who we really are’?

11. Christians believe in a ‘Trinitarian’ God – one being comprised of three persons (Father, Son and Holy Spirit). This means that other-centred love was central to God’s personality even before he created human beings.
    
    If this is true, what might it mean for the importance of our relationships in the big scheme of things? How might it change the nature of our relationships, and the way that we love? Do we need anybody other than ourselves to be complete, and if so, why?

Back